How to fit in
by firefly562
Summary: Bella is a shy and awkward student who has never really 'fit in', although desperate to avoid bullying. Edward is an attractive jock with a different girl on his arm every week who goes through life with ease. Their lives collide, and Edward agrees to teach Bella how to beat the bullies. But when Edward's lessons work too well, will Bella lose herself in the process? AH, T, ExB


**Disclaimer: I do not own twilight.**

**Everyone is 16 apart from Rosalie and Emmett who are 17, but they haven't really been introduced yet.**

I was the first person in the biology classroom, even before the teacher. I retired to my table at the back corner, where people couldn't really see me. Being unseen was my main objective when I was at school – the less I was seen, the less bullying, the less judging, less attention altogether. That's what I liked – or that was better than the alternative. Someone once told me 'Its better to be talked about nastily than it is not to be talked about at all'. There is nothing less true than this statement. To be unseen, for me, was absolutely vital to my mental health and emotional health. I couldn't stand the constant judgment, crisis, and bitchiness that came along with attention – but more prominently, Forks High.

Forks High – my own personal hell. Forks High was a place I never really got along with. The majority of the girls hated me for some reason that I'm unaware of. The boys paid absolutely no attention to me unless it was to say something mean. I know – so many girls have said this before, right? But I was the outcast. My middle name was 'freak' at this school. I liked books, not bitching. I enjoyed walks, not cheerleading. I liked Crystal Castles, not Rihanna. I spent most of my time alone, not surrounded by people. I couldn't walk across a flat surface without falling over. I didn't have a particular talent at anything, apart from art -but no one knew I could draw apart from my art teacher. I got straight As and was constantly called a nerd. All of these factors put together were a recipe for disaster, the true ingredients of a freak.

People began to file into the room. Edward Cullen came into the room with five girls buzzing around him. I rolled my eyes. Edward Cullen was the most obnoxious teenager to walk the corridor of Forks High. He was captain of the baseball AND soccer team; the ultimate jock. He also just happened to be the most handsome boy that I ever set my eyes upon. Tousled bronze hair. Pale skin. He was tall, probably about six foot, and muscly – but in a wiry way, not an overly muscular way. He wasn't too thin, but he was definitely not chubby. No way near – he was more thin than large. But the one feature I had noticed the most were his eyes, which were the most emerald I'd ever seen.

Sometimes I wondered if there was more to him than this. Why would someone want to be in his shoes? He was constantly judged. He must have to tread very carefully and he was always a topic of gossip. Even the slightest comment was top news for Forks High. I remember once he told his friend that he had a preference for Brunettes as opposed to Blondes, and the next day the majority of the blonde girls of our school (which was a lot of them) had dyed their hair brown. It was quite pathetic really. Every single girl in Forks High wanted him as her boyfriend, and they would go to extremes to get what they wanted. Many of them got their wish, but it was only a week each at the most as he was a player. The girl would believe it was love forever, but she would come in the next week in floods of tears. I remember a girl named Hayley went out with him once. One day they were making out in the middle of the cafeteria, and the next day Edward had dumped her for her best friend. This made major gossip. I pick up my gossip from overhearing people, as there is no way that I had any connection with any of the people who pass on the news.

Edward Cullen was perfect.

_I hated him._

One thing that I had definitely learnt through being a student at Forks High was that looks were deceiving. In fact, the most beautiful people were often ugly on the inside. He was a total player – he had a different girl every week.

I saw him swing one of his worshippers into his arms and full on kissed her on the lips. Her name was Lauren Mallory. Ugh. I looked away awkwardly. It seemed like it should be such a private moment, but he was kissing her in front of everyone that it was almost impossible to not stare. A couple of jocks wolf-whistled at them, and they broke apart, both with the cockiest grins on their faces. Lauren whispered something in his ear and Edward's eyebrows shot up and he flashed a grin at her and sat down. Edward was wearing a nice shirt today. It was just a black T-shirt, but when he turned around I saw it was a band shirt. I peeked over at it and to my great surprise it had Nirvana written on it – I was expecting something like Katy Perry or something like that. It wasn't that I hated Katy Perry, or Rihanna, or any of these artists that so many people were gushing over these days – I just didn't like the music. It was boring. I respected people's music choices, and of course I wasn't going to put down their choices because everybody is different, but to me music was like a religion. In fact, music was the main thing that kept me going, apart from my family. The fact that quite a lot of people at school overlooked older music and most importantly electronic music made me a little sad because it would be nice to talk about music with someone. I gained a little – only a little – respect for Cullen.

The teacher burst into the room, late. "Sorry I'm late everyone, I had some business to carry out" she began. "Today we are looking at weight and the dangers that come with eating too much, or too little."

_Oh no. _I thought. There is absolutely no way I'm going to get through this lesson without a snide comment or a stab.

I'd been anorexic for two years now, non-coincidentally the same time I joined this fucking school. Lauren Mallory – the girl who was just sucking face with Edward – had made it her mission in life to destroy mine, and she had achieved. I was so lonely. On the first day in swim class, she commented on the size of my thighs. On the third day she shoved me. In the second week, she spread a rumor that I had spent my summer at a fat camp. Everyone avoided me like the plague. The boys laughed at me as I walked by and made comments, and the girls bitched about me and spread rumors. 'Fat', and "ugly" were the only greetings I got as I walked through the corridors.

Things haven't changed since then, apart from one thing. I lost 30 pounds, dropping down to a deathly 98 pounds, which was extremely overweight for my age. I hoped, then, I would be good enough for them, good enough for myself. But the only thing I had was loneliness. I sat on my own everyday, and there isn't a single person at this school that I could call my friend apart from my books and my music.

I snapped back to listen to the teacher.

"…. And so I decided that today we will work out our BMIs and create a chart showing the BMIs of the class." Miss White announced, smiling triumphantly. She set out two scales at the front of the class. "Whenever you're ready" she finished. Girls around the room squealed loudly, complaining and whining.

"NO!" I shrieked. Everyone turned around and looked at me, surprised by my sudden outburst. This was the first time I had spoken in this class for months. Lauren took in my sweats and hoodie.

"What's up, Bella? Worried?" Lauren jabbed.

"Lauren! Get on with your work everyone. And you, Bella." Miss White ordered.

Nervously, I got in the queue for the scales. People began to compare weights. _Shit._ As I neared the front of the queue, I began to sweat. I climbed onto the scales quickly and jumped off them just as fast in order to eliminate any chance of anyone looking over. _97 pounds._ I sighed. _Charlie will be disappointed. I've lost weight again._ I made my way back to my seat, drowning in my XXL size hoodie. I felt so fat. I knew that really I was just skin and bones, but I felt so fat. I bought my clothes the size I felt I was, not the size I was actually.

I worked out my BMI. It was 17.18. At 5"3, 97 pounds was very thin.

The teacher began to take in the results, plotting them onto a graph on the board. She went around the class.

"21.70" said Edward.

"20.42" Alice, Edward's twin informed her. Alice wasn't much like Edward. She was popular as well, but she had never been nasty to me before.

"24.76"

"26.30"

People carried on calling out their BMIs and Miss White carried on plotting them on the graph.

When it came to Lauren's turn she shuffled in her seat a little and announced "19.57" as if it was an attractive and desirable thing to be thin. At 19.57, Lauren was still a healthy size as anything under 18.5 was underweight. She turned and gave me a smirk as if to say, "I'm thin. You're fat." I could see why people would see me as overweight. I was covered from neck to feet in XXL sweats, and that easily distorted my body.

It came to my turn and I gulped and said nothing.

"Bella, its your turn." Lauren pushed for my answer. I shot a dirty look at her.

"17.18" I said quietly. A few people around the classroom gasped, but mostly people scoffed. A few "yeah rights" were thrown about, and I just looked at my table without saying anything as the teacher plotted it. My point looked like it didn't belong with the rest of them – just like me in this school. I didn't belong here.

"What? She doesn't even look thin! In fact -" Lauren was interrupted by the teacher.

"That's enough Lauren! One more word from you and you'll be off to the Principal!"

Lauren huffed, and shook out her blonde peroxide hair in a manner that I supposed was meant to be sexy. Edward glanced over at her and Lauren batted her eyelashes. _Pathetic._

I stared at my feet, and waited for the lesson to end - red-faced, alone, and in silence. When the lesson finally ended I attempted to make a quick exit but I tripped over a book that was on the floor, dropping all of my own textbooks and pouring the content of my pencil case out.

Of course, Edward and Lauren and many of the class started to laugh at me. "Thank you so much for making my day Isabella Swan." Lauren exclaimed and climbed up on her toes and kissed Edward on the cheek, and left hand in hand.

The last person in the classroom, I gathered my stuff with another sigh and trudged out of the room to walk alone to my next lesson.

…

After my Spanish class it was time for lunch - the worst part of the day. I always ended up sitting on a table on my own, not eating anything.

I sat down with an apple and a sandwich that I knew was only going to be wasted. As soon as my butt hit the chair, I saw Lauren and her little clique strut up to me. Her clique consisted of herself, a girl named Jessica with long brown hair which were obviously extensions and the girl who passed on the gossip, Elena who had short blonde hair but more importantly no brain whatsoever, and Rosalie who had the blonde hair of a princess, and an appearance that any girl would die for. They were all of course part of the cheerleading squad, with Rosalie as the head cheerleader. Rosalie was in the year above me so luckily I never came across her, but I had heard rumors that she was the 'Queen Bee' as many would put it.

They all came and sat around me, Lauren and Elena on one side of me. Rosalie and Jessica were on the other. I began to tense and I felt very nervous, breaking out in a sweat.

"Aren't you going to eat that?" Lauren asked me tauntingly, glancing over at my apple.

"I'm full." I shrugged and raised an eyebrow at her.

"Oh, what a shame." She said almost kindly. "I dare you to eat it." _I can't. I won't. _I wasn't going to force-feed myself just to impress Lauren and her friends. Sure, I wanted to fit in but I wasn't _that_ desperate.

"You know what, Lauren, it was nice talking to you but I've finished eating now." I said sweetly, and I left. As I walked into the corridors I walked straight into Edward Cullen and landed butt-first onto the floor.

"Oh... I'm so sorry." I muttered on the ground.

"My fault entirely." He offered a hand to me and I accepted it. _Oh my God. Edward Cullen is actually talking to me. Not only is he talking to me but also he is being nice._ He pulled me up.

"Thanks." I said and then I made a fatal mistake. I looked into his eyes. Bad move, Bella. I Froze for a moment and for a second I found myself lost in the emeralds above me. I snapped out of it and slapped myself mentally.

"Well… See you round I guess." He actually smiled at me. The moment was interrupted when a girl named Charlotte walked past us.

"So Edward, are we still on for tonight then?" Charlotte asked him flirtatiously. I'm pretty sure my mouth fell open. I thought he was going out with Lauren? Maybe I was wrong…. But it seemed like they were going out when Lauren was sucking Edward's face off in front of everyone in the class only this morning. He really was awful. What a player! I couldn't believe he had the guts. I waited for his answer.

"Yeah sure. I'll pick you up at seven?" Edward replied. I wasn't surprised. I actually thought – just for a moment when he helped me up – that maybe there was a gentleman in him after hall. Turns out I'm wrong. No girl deserves to be treated like that. I hate so say but not even _Lauren_ should be treated that way. I raised an eyebrow at him and gave him an amused look but he wasn't looking at me, he was looking at Charlotte.

Charlotte ran her red hair through her fingers. "Sounds great!" She practically squealed. She was ecstatic just to be going out with _the_ Edward Cullen. I had no doubts that her popularity would shoot to the skies after people found out. Of course, with that newly founded popularity would come the hatred from Lauren, but she didn't seem to care that much that he was in a relationship. With Edward, any timing would do, it didn't matter if he was in a relationship as long as you got to go out with him. _How sad._ I thought.

Then Edward surprised me by giving her a full on kiss on the lips. This shocked me – Lauren or anyone else could come out right now and see. Maybe that's why he did it. Maybe he _liked_ the attention and the drama. Maybe he was creating rumors to keep up his ladies-man image. Or maybe he was just a scumbag. The broke apart and Charlotte skipped off, happy.

I laughed.

"What?" Edward turned to me.

"I thought you were in a relationship with Lauren?" I asked, amused.

"Yeah. Don't tell anyone about Charlotte, please."

Disgusted and amused, I turned to him. "First of all, I don't have anyone to tell. Second of all, if you didn't want people to know you shouldn't have done it in a public place in front of me. And third of all, that's not a very nice way to treat a person, is it?"

He seemed surprised by this. I doubt any girl ever said anything confrontation to him ever – they were too busy trying to impress him. "First of all I didn't ask your opinion, Swan and so butt the fuck out. Second of all, what I do is my own business. Third of all…" He stopped.

"Never mind. I'm sorry that I swore at you, it was rude. I'll see you round Swan." He smiled. Then he walked away.

And that was the first time I had a proper conversation with Edward Cullen.

**Review and tell me what you think.**


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